On a recent week-long, long-awaited trip to Mexico, I stayed almost completely off my phone for the first six days and, wow, did it feel good. So good that I’m motivated to share what worked for me in hopes of inspiring others to experience the same clarity, peace and revitalization I felt. 

Why disconnect from your phone’s constant demands on your attention?

  1. You’re better able to truly relax and make the most of being away.
  2. Your eyes and brain need a restorative break!
  3. Noticing the world around you can be a lot of fun.
  4. Etc., etc., etc.

Now, if you’re a person with limitless willpower, this guidance is not for you. If you’re a person who adores cradling your phone in your hand while you stroke its screen all day and night, stop reading now. (And maybe seek help.) But if you’re one of the many people who picks up your phone throughout the day, maybe initially for a justifiable reason, only to find yourself scrolling through an app you didn’t even remember opening, this advice might help, particularly if you’re heading out on vacation or even just want to make the most of a weekend.

Just let your friends take the pictures.

So, here’s what I did:

“ON VACATION”
  1. “Family, you’re on your own!” I told my family that I would not be available unless an emergency occurred, in which case, my husband would be able to reach me via the friend I was staying with. This was the hardest part: I feared that the universe would punish me for stepping away from my family, like I was jinxing them by not being a text or call away to solve all the problems. This is a very dangerous headspace to exist in! I reminded myself that while yes, awful things happen on the regular, good stuff does, too. Good things happen all the time! Plus, my people are capable of self-reliance; they are not asking me to live in fear nor does being constantly alert on the other end of a phone guarantee any outcomes. What really serves those I love is to make sure that I’m building and maintaining my own mental resilience, so that when they do need me, I’m coming from a place of strength rather than depletion. 
  2. Notifications, off. Obviously. All of them. With one exception: WhatsApp, which I kept available to communicate with the friend I was staying with. (I muted all other active chats within the app.) 
  3. “ON VACATION” I made a folder on my phone labeled “ON VACATION” and moved all my communication apps – email, Messages, Messenger, phone, contacts, etc. – into it, then moved it to a back page. As noted above, the exception was WhatsApp, which I used to check in with my host instead of Messages to avoid seeing all the “regular” texts. Since I was staying with her and we weren’t on any kind of schedule, I didn’t need to use this much beyond asking if she needed me to pick anything up on the way back from surfing. 
  4. “DO NOT EVEN!!!” I renamed the folder holding the few social media apps I still have on my phone and pushed it even farther out of sight.
  5. No photos till the end. I went for walks without my phone. I lay on the beach with a book without my phone. I sat at a table eating tacos and laughing with my friends without a phone. By not having my phone, I wasn’t doing my usual thing of constantly taking photos. Because I wasn’t constantly taking photos – because my phone wasn’t in my hand – I never found myself “accidentally” scrolling through my phone wondering how that happened. I spent the time looking around and thinking about how I would describe the sights in words, a fine exercise in observation, and saved the actual photo-taking till the final couple days.

What I did use my phone for: Checking the surf report and weather, and mapping a path to the spots. This usually took about five minutes. The rest of the time, I read, wrote, napped, swam, ate amazing food, explored the little town I was in and otherwise did the things that make a vacation, a vacation. Never once did I miss my phone as an appendage. 

Individual circumstances will vary, but if any of what I did helps someone else successfully disconnect, I’ll consider this post well worth the effort. And please, share your own experiences!